I am here at chemo now, my very last one, doing homework with Colton. I am experiencing a huge range of emotions, and cant seem to stop crying. It seems that these last months have been the longest and the fastest of our whole lives. My brain and emotions cant seem to catch up with what today really is.
My heart is also overflowing at the kindnesses that I have received already today. There is a line from Mulan II that expresses that better - something about when the heart is overflowing some is sure to spill from the eyes...Preston stayed home from work to help get the kids to a friend's house and to bring me and Colton down to my last chemo appt. He just continues to do so much for me, and the kids, and never makes one fuss. He just never stops giving. One of the girls' YW leaders has Ky/Kels today even though she doesnt have any kiddos of her own yet. So kind that she is willing to play with them all day. Preston was sweet to stop at our local Dutch Bro for my chemo treat (peach,mango,banana smoothie with cream). Same collge kids were working today. The one guy always asks what we are up to being out and about so early. When I told him we were headed to my last chemo appt, all 3 employees cheered and congratulated me. I also got treated to my smoothie at no charge. I had already been crying, and that just topped it. So much support and extra kindness. I know it wasnt a big deal to them, but it was an extra big deal to me. John came down with Preston to work on math today (CSD out of school again today). He was also so sweet to chat with colton on the way down and helped bring in Colton's stuff while we were getting settled. So many little things that really mean so very much.
Appt with Dr McGregor was extra long, and a bit stressful. There are are warring opinions right now between her and Dr Faddis (my surgeon) about what to do about node surgery. Medical oncology opinions say take all of the nodes no matter what because of positive biopsy, surgeon says if we get a negative result at the time of surgery then we only take the one, or none. WIll have lots to research and find out in the next several weeks to learn about the risks and concerns of either choice. It is going to ultimately be my choice, but it is going to take some extra time and lots of questions to find out what to choose to do. Hoping that we will receive some guidance and direction from Heavenly Father, too.
Last chemo is today, but I will have about a month before surgery. At least 1/2 of that time will be recovering from chemo. I am still waiting for the MRI/lab work to also be scheduled. Will be 3rd or 4th week of March. Waiting for insurance auth and then will get on the books. Surgery is scheduled for April 5. Will meet with medical oncologist at end of April. Will get 4-6 weeks "rest" window before starting radiation. Radiation will be 5 days/week over 6 weeks. Hopefully by the time the kids get out of school I will be all done with the monster big stuff. Just will take one big thing at a time.
Enjoying just sitting here with Colton while he reads to me. He is really finding so much success and fun with his reading skills. Math test was a monster, so we are choosing some fun time - reading and LUNCH! Also, just got some extra good news. My cute nurse just told me we are going to do some tweaking with my pre-chemo meds today. When she gives me the Benedryl I am literally unconscious in seconds, no kidding. She is going to run it in a bag of saline over a 10 min window vs the instant add to my IV. Going to see if that will keep me from being completely snockered today. Will keep our fingers crossed! That will be awesome to not go home drugged and useless today. Will let Colton & I get more homework done today too.
Guess that is all for now. Will maybe write more later if I end up not be unconscious, otherwise I will put preston in charge from here on out this week to update with little posts. Thanx again to everyone who has sent their good wishes. Means so much to know that we are being thought about!
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