Day 4

I am sitting here at the desk trying not to pass out or throw up, still waiting for a heating/cooling contractor to show up...Maybe it wasnt such a good idea to schedule him now, but we have to get the fireplace fixed for the winter so our room isnt such a meatlocker. Also listening to all of the little kiddos do battle this morning. Ceana is sick, and little people are fighting everything they have been asked to do. I dont have the energy or strength to do battle today, and poor Kaeli is trying to work on school jobs around mediating all the hysterics. I have separated everyone for now, will see if that really works or not...

Things have been really rough. I did try the 1/2 sleep & anti-nausea med, which led to a really bad night. The 1/2 didnt even touch the nausea and I was awake most of the night. I am finding that the one med that always worked during pregnancies is not doing so well this time. I have to force myself to not spit it out and then it adds a headache and only works for a short window of time. The other meds bring some relief, but they do by keeping me mostly or totally sedated. With that sedation is coming lots of nightmares too....Still lots to ask about and figure out.

I talked to my chemo nurse late yesterday who was concerned that fatigue and nausea are so extreme, but it is not uncommon. She said that next treatment we will keep tweaking the anti-nausea meds and see if we can find something to keep me more comfy. I could tell she was concerned, but not sure what direction to take. We have a call into my medical oncology Dr and will see what they might be able to suggest.

In the meantime, we keep doing what we are doing, and being extra thankful to all of those who are serving our family in so many ways. The meals have been wonderful and so generous. It is also good to know that little ones are being taken care of. Hopefully we will be able to work in school jobs soon too, esp if I am going to be so sick. That will be a huge help and relief for me.

We are ever grateful to all of those around us who are doing so much for our family. I know that thank you will never be enough to say all we would like to.